Archive for the ‘married’ Tag

1 Year   Leave a comment

My husband and I recently had our one year wedding anniversary.  We had been together as a couple for 3 years prior to getting married, so there were not a whole lot of surprises for either of us once we were sharing an apartment together.  Some things I’ve learned about my wonderful husband this past year:

  • He is quickly mollified and happy when I acknowledge when he is right about something.  “You’re right” has probably stopped more arguments between us than anything else.
  • Being disabled and not working, he has developed a different time sense than I have, who has a full time busy job.  Something this works in our favor, and sometimes not.
  • He likes to stretch himself.  He likes to cook something he’s never cooked before.  He likes to try new cooking gadgets. He likes to learn new things.  He likes to listen to new viewpoints.
  • He is not afraid to test himself and push himself physically, despite his disabilities.

Some things I think my husband has learned about me:

  • I’m far from perfect, and sometimes I get cranky or impatient or forgetful (or, heaven forbid, all three).
  • When I have the time and resources, I blossom when I can do creative things.
  • My faith is as integral to me as my circulatory system, hair color, and skin color.
  • I love to laugh at silly things and clever things.

We are just as in love now as when we got married.  We work very well together, we compliment each other in personalities, we respect each other, and we try every day to make the other person’s life better and more comfortable.  I thank God that we are together.

Advertisements

Posted January 31, 2016 by Maureen in Christian, Musings

Tagged with , , , ,

PROMISES TO KEEP   Leave a comment

I made a promise to myself years ago and I want help in keeping it.  After my divorce at 25 years old and all the many years since I have met and made friends with lots of single people.  Almost all of them have gotten married.  And the second they get married — and I really do mean it is immediately after — they stop being friends with me.  I just drop off the face of the earth as far as they are concerned.

Now of course I realize that people’s lives and priorities change when they get married.  I have never expected the same level of communication or activities with my friend once they got married.  But to just DROP me?  Not ever get another phone call or email from you?  What is that???  Why did I deserve to be treated like that?

This has happened to me over and over and…. well, I’ve lost count.  So I made a promise to myself.  That I would never, ever do that to someone.  I would never stop being friends with someone when I got married.  That I would make an effort to still see them and talk with them.

I want to keep that promise.  No one deserves to be dropped suddenly and without any good reason from a friendship.  It is a terrible way to treat someone, and I never ever want to do it.

Posted February 9, 2015 by Maureen in Being Single

Tagged with , , ,

Thinkin’ about….. marriage   Leave a comment

The current relationship I am in is at a stand-still.  Due to a misunderstanding (with some cultural stuff thrown in) he has a wrong impression of my living situation and the kind of woman I am. 

Yesterday I came home from an OK day at work.  Lonely.  Wishing I had someone to greet me and to talk about my day with.  Same as it has been for, oh, 25+ years.  I was contacted yesterday by someone I had broken things off with in January.  I hadn’t heard from him in about 7 months and thought he was out of my life.  He wanted to pick up where we left off.

See, the thing is, despite everything else, he was the only man I have met in the past three years that ever spent time with me.  Yes, it was online (he lives across the States).  But it was steady. He and I got to know each other pretty well, at least as far as what we told ourselves.  I told the truth about myself, but I had no way of knowing if what he said was true.  We would also send text messages and talked on the phone a few times.  When we talked he would ask about my family and my day and my hopes and dreams.  He was there every day, and on the weekends.

Which is what my woman’s heart wants.  I want someone who is interested in me.  Who knows me.  Who tries to understand me.  Who spends time with me.  Not every waking moment — heavens; spare me!  I couldn’t stand that after being single for so long.  No, I don’t mean joined-at-the-hip kind of spending time with.

Why is it my ‘stalker’ is the only one who seems to be truly interested in me?  Oh – don’t worry.  I am not going there again.  Nope.  Been there, done that, had the relationship, got the scars, not interested in doing it again.

But the man I am presently….. dating?  Hmmm. No.  He lives in another state.  In a relationship with?  No.  You have to actually communicate and see each other once in a while for that to happen.  My present man has said he wants marriage and has led me to believe (without explicitly expressing it) that it is me he would like to be married to.  And yet he has spent less time with me (despite many many many phone calls and a weekend spent in his City) in the four months we’ve known each other than this other guy, who I never actually met in person. 

I never would have believed it if someone had told me that it would be so hard to find someone who likes me as much as I like him.  Who wants to be my husband as much as I want to be his wife.  I know we need to be careful what we wish for — but I do wish I was married.

Posted October 13, 2010 by Maureen in Being Single

Tagged with , ,