Archive for June 2019

Like John   Leave a comment

A couple of Sundays ago, on Father’s Day, our Pastor preached a sermon that talked about being authentic.  About being honest in your walk and talk.  About having integrity.  There were other things, but that was the theme for the day.  He used men from his life, especially his own father and father-in-law, as real-life examples.  It was inspiring and even heart-warming.

At the end of his sermon, Pastor asked for any men who wanted to, to come forward before the platform.  He asked them to come forward if they wanted to commit or re-commit to being men of integrity, who would follow God and walk the talk.

I am a member of a small church, but we are multi-generational and multi-ethnic.  It is one of the many reasons I like attending there.  We have an older man in our congregation, I’ll call him “John” (not his real name).  John married late in life – he was in his 60’s and his wife was in her 50’s.  They have had a happy marriage, from what I have heard.  John is now in his late 70’s and is much more frail, even just in the last couple of years.  He does not make it every Sunday, and when he does he has an assistant (aside from his wife) to help him, and uses a walker.

That Father’s Day Sunday a couple of weeks ago, John was in church by himself.  Pastor called for the men to come forward, and many did.  He started praying for them, and I reached out my hand (like others did) and prayed with him for these men.  I usually keep my eyes closed when I’m praying, but for whatever reason I opened them as Pastor prayed, and I saw John.  He had gotten himself up, I’m sure with difficulty.  He was slowly making his way down the aisle, using his walker.  Very slowly, he kept walking until he was standing behind the men.  Pastor had continued to pray.

And I thought to myself: “I want to be like John.”  John has been a Christian many years, and yet he still sought to be better.  To walk more of the talk than he had before.  To be more authentic, more honest in his relationship with God than he had before.  I don’t know how much John could even hear the points of the sermon, and I know that it is a slow, difficult process for him to move at all.  And yet John had gotten himself up and had walked up to stand with the other men, because he wanted to be a better Christian.  I want to be like John.  I want to be willing to be molded by God, used by God, and humble enough to recognize I could do better, when I am as old as John.  Be like John.

Posted June 24, 2019 by Maureen in Christian, Musings

Tagged with , ,

SF Dude Dating Story   Leave a comment

I have been writing a lot lately.  Not on this blog (obviously).  I’ve been writing a book.  Actually, the story I wanted to tell turned out to be so long it ended up being two books.  It was a very gratifying, fun process to go through.  I truly loved every minute of it.  I have no idea what (if anything) I will be doing with my two books.  I’m still waiting on God to lead me.  In the meantime, I have started on the next one.  I am just having so much fun writing Christian romances!

But today I wanted to share another dating of my stories with you.  This one took place last year, when I went through a brief time where I thought I’d try internet dating again.  It is super hard to find a true Christian man, on an internet dating site, that lives in my general area.  But on this particular site I met a man who said he lived in San Francisco.  Let’s call him Bob (not his real name).  According to what he said, he lived about 30 minutes from me, which is terrific.  We exchanged some emails and then, as is usual, our personal phone numbers.

I was getting some mixed signals from him and I wasn’t sure about him. But, I believe in giving people the benefit of the doubt, since that is how I like to be treated.  And I hadn’t gotten a clear answer from God about him, so I continued to casually talk to him.  My more-recent strategy when I meet men is to talk about God.  Keep the focus on God, on my faith, my church, reading the Bible, etc.  A true Christian man will not mind this.  Someone who is not a true Christian might parrot some things back to me, but they will not be able to hide the fact they are not true Christians for long.

At one point we agreed via email that I would call him when I got home one night.  I was still feeling pretty unsure about him.  It was about 6:15pm or so when my phone rang.  It was Bob.  He wanted to know (well, it was more of a demand) why I hadn’t called him yet?  Hadn’t we agreed that I would call him?  He’d been waiting for my call.  I was taken aback.  I told him I did remember I was going to call him, but it was 6:15pm and I had only gotten home about 7 minutes prior to that.  After that he calmed down.  It was during that conversation that he told me he does not go to church every Sunday.  He “likes to sleep in”, and so he doesn’t go every Sunday.

If you are a true Christian man, you go to church every Sunday.  That fact, combined with a bunch of other little clues, started me drawing back from Bob.  Another red flag for me was that, at this point we had been emailing for a week.  At no time during that time did he ever once offer to meet me or pick me up so we could meet in person.  If you only live 30 minutes away from someone, generally you want to meet them right away.  He didn’t make excuses about it – he just didn’t offer to meet me.

The next day he seemed to kick his anxiety and hovering into high gear.  I got a phone call at 11:30pm, which I did not answer.  The next day he wanted to know why I didn’t answer.  He wanted to hear my voice before he went to bed, he told me.  I told him I go to bed before 10:00pm and his call woke me up.  I got text after text from him during the day.  He wanted me to go on Google Hangouts so we could instant message during the day.  I told him our network at work wouldn’t allow that, and that I couldn’t do it even if I could, since I was, you know, working.  The next day the text messages were just as bad. I asked him to stop since I was at work, and he just kept asking me to instant message him.

So I sent Bob a text message, telling him that because he didn’t go to church every Sunday like I did, I did not think we were compatible.  I thanked him for his time and wished him good luck on his continued search.  He was surprised and started to argue with me.  I blocked him on my phone and email.  I couldn’t block him, per se, on the dating web site.  He left me a hateful message there, so I deleted my account.

I don’t normally break off with someone via text messaging, nor do I recommend it.  In his particular case, he was showing no respect for my boundaries or feelings, and I had no qualms about doing it.  I hope he can find someone, but for me – it is just me and God. Unless or until He sends a true Godly man to me, if that is God’s will for me.

Posted June 3, 2019 by Maureen in Being Single, Christian

Tagged with ,