Lessons from Relationships   1 comment

I got married when I was 20 years old and he was 25.  Sadly, I was divorced by the time I was 25.  Before I got married I had ideas in my mind about what love was, and what being married was like. 

The reality was nothing like any of my ideas.  Here are some things I have learned about relationships 

  •  Relationships change over time.  You don’t establish a relationship then dust your hands together and say “Done!  Accomplished!”  Relationships are living organisms that need to be fed and nurtured
  • Relationships are nothing like what you read about in the romance novels, or what you (mostly) see in movies or on the TV.
  • Just because someone asks you to marry them does not mean you have to say “Yes”.
  • Just because you think (or even if you feel very very sure) you are in love with someone, it does not mean you have to marry that person. 
  • Relationships have ebbs and flows, high points and low points.  Just because you might be in an ebb or low point does not mean you have to toss the whole relationship.
  • Don’t compare yourself to other couples, or hold yourself to others standards.  Each relationship is a bit different.
  • Communication is key, and you need to find the kind of communication that will work for you as a couple.

Now maybe you knew all that.  But I can assure you – I had NO idea of any of this before I got married, or got involved in a long-term relationship.  I wish I had had someone to tell me these things.  Remember, I got married in the dark ages, before the internet was what it was today.  

What about you?  What relationship lessons have you learned that you wish you had known ahead of time?

 

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Posted August 20, 2013 by Maureen in Being Single, Memories

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One response to “Lessons from Relationships

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  1. Just because someone loves you and you think it’s the best you’ll get, doesn’t mean you should jump in. It’s important to find that love that carries you in all walks of life – the good, the bad, or the ugly. Those vows are honest… when I’m poor and make a terribly bad decision that leaves us unable to even afford milk – will you still love me? Like, no, I don’t accept you to like me or stand me at that moment but will you still overall love me. That’s the right kind of love.

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