About Searching…..   3 comments

I have been divorced 27 years.  In all that time I’ve wanted to be married again.  And of course, I’ve thought about who my future someone would be.  How tall would he be?  What color hair?  Would he be a good kisser?  What kind of job would he have?  What would he like to do for hobbies?  Football or baseball?  What would his family be like?  And on and on.

And once you really start seriously looking you begin to shorten “the list” and make compromises and decide what is really important to you.  I have always tried to keep an open mind about the qualities of my future someone and have always had a short list.  I’m far from a perfect person and I don’t expect to find someone who is perfect or who fits all my ideals.

I met someone who is the most interesting, intelligent, thoughtful, kind, considerate man I have ever met in my life.  And — he likes me for ME.  Is this man “THE ONE”?  Is my search over?  I don’t honestly know.  There are things we still need to discover and learn about each other and I have found that time has a wonderful way of working those kinds of things out.  The other shoe drops.  An “uh oh” moment occurs.  You meet the family.  Those kinds of things come out over time.  Maybe I’ll discover something (or more than one something) that will cause me to back off and break things off.  Maybe he will. 

I don’t know.  For now what I do know is we are enjoying each other’s company and getting to know each other, and neither of us is in a hurry to move things along too fast.  So I have stopped searching.  Time will tell if the search will be taken up again.

Posted August 20, 2011 by Maureen in Being Single, Musings

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3 responses to “About Searching…..

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  1. Ater trying to study a lot of single females and their decisions thay make along the way, I must say Maureen, that you’re seeming to make an odd decision here. You don’t really seem to be writing from a point of view of being optimisitc….it’s like you’re waiting sabotage… I was excited to see that maybe things were grooving well then boom…awaiting a painful experience via this wonderful guy after meeting his family kinda story…

    argh…love shouldn’t be this complicated…


    • You are right – I have been disappointed so many times, I protect myself. Thanks for your comments — I DO wish it were easier.

    • You are so right T but oddly enough I can totally relate to Maureen! I have only been divorced a short time and already I’m terrified about the uh-oh moment and I’m not even dating anyone yet! Propbably never will now! lol For me it is more fear of what I will do to mess things up…but it’s still scary. Love is difficult whether you’re in it or looking for it. Either way I am so glad you found someone…good luck!

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