Relationship Seismograph   Leave a comment

Do you know those seismographs they use to monitor/predict/show earthquakes?  (like above)  The little sensitive needles travel across the paper, and move and jump according to what they sense.  Sometimes the model has multiple needles, sometimes only one.

Sometimes, in a relationship, if we are sensitive enough to ourselves and what is going on, our needles may jump.  Or spike.  “You’ve been married how many times?!!”  “You slept with her!??!”  “You lied!”  “You’re breaking up with me over that??”

I had a mild tremor in a relationship this week.  Found out something about one of his prior relationships.   I had known about the relationship, but what I discovered was something new.   Such as: he was still in love with her.  My needles started jumping up and down, making squiggles across the paper. 

Perhaps I am misunderstanding what has been said, and afer all I only know what he tells me. I’m not there (he lives half-way across the country) and I don’t know her, and so I have to guess and intuit from what has been told me.  I believe in giving people the benefit of the doubt, at least the first couple of times.  My incredulity only extends so far. But I like it when people give me the benefit of the doubt and don’t label or jump to conclusions, so in keeping with “The Golden Rule” of the Bible — treat others as you would like to be treated — I have asked for clarification from him about this relationship that I thought was done and that he was over.

Perhaps my needles will spike at his answer.  But perhaps they will continue their serene,  merry way.  We shall see.

**UPDATE:  I heard his explanation and I believe what he told me.  He is very fond of her and they are friends, but nothing more.  The needles are still wavering, though.  Stay tuned.

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